Recycled Review: Labyrinth

Heckler and I were at the Great British Beer Festival on Thursday[1] and sadly Starship Troopers 3: Marauder isn't out in the UK or we would definitely have watched it when we crawled back to Sten's flat [2]. But that's no reason not to put up some content. I previously said I would put up my thoughts on Labyrinth (1986, Dir:Jim Henson, trailer). Here's what is in my note book:

She's wearing jeans under that medieval frock
Don't say "David Bowie" 3 times
Sten is a rubbish Goblin King (He doesn't wear enough makeup)
Not the Bog of Eternal Stench!
Is that all it does? Smell?
There's a horrible bitey thing on a stick! And it's biting another goblin's arse!
Heckler sleeps with Antonio Banderas[3]
Babies: not evil, just incontinent.

The film's been out for 20 years, so I won't recap here. I'm just going to touch on why I think this film is an improvement on Jim Henson's previous puppet fantasy The Dark Crystal (reviewed at Heckler and Kochk!). 2 main performances (Sarah the heroine[4] and Jared the Goblin King[5]) are played by live actors. Most of the rest of the cast are puppets. This emphasizes the difference between the real world and the goblin world, and between the run of the mill goblins and Jared, the tall, good-looking, androgynous rock-god-king.

There's songs (many of them written and performed by Bowie). Sarah grows up and learns something. There's some real scary bits. And, with all due respect the Sten, Bowie nails the whole goblin king thing - the combination of attractive, scary and unpredictable all at once is just right. The labyrinth itself sometimes looks a bit like an illustration in a book, but that's mainly because, as it turns out, it is.

Jim Henson obviously learnt from The Dark Crystal and built on that, with good results. As we know, it didn't do too well at the box office, but it's had a long tail with video and DVD. And I can see why - I now feel like watching it again...


[1] It sounds like we're inseparable and live in each other's pockets; I assure you that is not the case.
[2] Good Point (for fans of the book): Armoured suits make an appearance
Good Point (for me): Some theology makes an appearance
Good Point (faint praise): It's better than Starship Troopers 2: Hero of the Federation
Bad Points: The rest of the film
[3] This was byplay, not related to the film
[4] Jennifer Connelly, who went on to win an Oscar in 2002
[5] David Bowie, in one of the two non-human roles that he absolutely nails.

Dark Crystal

I didn't take notes off the whiteboard at the last movie night, which is probably just as well as there were some unusual illustrations. For the record we watched 2 more episodes of Crime Traveller (which I will review when we've finished, and this time I won't show Heckler my notes before hand), The Dark Crystal and an episode of Wonder Woman[1].

So The Dark Crystal (Trailer) - a fantasy movie where all the actors are puppets from Jim Henson. It looks like if you search youtube you can find the whole film up there if you've not seen it or forgotten about it some time in the last 25 years. The first question is, does it show it's age? Visually, no, because although there has been puppetry in films since then, the state of the art doesn't seem to have advanced greatly. Storywise, it's a little simple - it's definitely a kids film[4], and other than looking good (Aughra's Orrery has stuck with me since) doesn't make much attempt to hold the attention of adults.

That simple story - The Last Gelfling™ has been brought up by the Gentle Mystics™ to find a Shard of The Crystal and use it to Repair the Crystal in Accordance With The Prophecy, or The Evil Skeksis™ will destroy the world. Not that there aren't some good bits - (Jen - Wings? I don't have wings! Kira - Of course not. You're a boy. And: Jen - The prophecy didn't say anything about this! Kira - Prophets don't know everything!)

On balance not as good as the next time Jim Henson went for fantasy with puppets - Labyrinth. Which not coincidentally came as part of the three pack of Henson Fantasies (with MirrorMask). We watched Labyrinth before Heckler and Kochk started up, but I have the notes, so I'll briefly cover that real soon now.

[1] Notes made during Wonder Woman:

Wonder Woman is a Super Secretary
The Falcon really doesn't like Aubergines[2]
Are you going to change in front of the window Diana Prince?
Wonder Woman has flat stunt boots and heeled posing boots[3]
Good thing they use the same notation on Paradise Island. What, Greek letters?

[2] I have not the faintest clue what this was about
[3] So that's how she does it!
[4] LeMat was saying how it scared him when he first saw it